13 THINGS I LEARNED HALFWAY THROUGH COLLEGE

After my first semester of college I wrote a post called, "10 Things You Learn At College." It was the first time that I saw a post really take off. To this date it is still one of my top-viewed blog posts. Looking back on it makes me laugh a little bit. I still believe in everything that I said, but in a short time my life is completely different than it was then. So since I am about halfway through college now (I still don't fully believe this), I decided to check in and share what else I have learned.

1. What you learn outside of the lecture hall can be just as important. Not to sound too cliché, but you learn a lot about yourself in college. You learn from the people that you surround yourself with and the experiences you have with them, and these lessons help you grow as a person.

2. Living in an apartment is very different than living in dorms. Yes, you had your freedom in the dorms--away from your parents that is. But life after the dorms is a whole other game. Welcome to land of cooking and buying your own toilet paper.

3. It's not always about the grade. It can be difficult to accept a lower grade if you are someone who is used to getting straight A's. Sometimes the most valuable lesson is learning to not overwork yourself just to get the A.

4. Sometimes you need to dance in the rain. A while ago at work, someone said they needed to pull me out of my shell more. It's something that I have been trying to work on. In general, I would say that I am a pretty outgoing person, so I have been trying to be more social--accepting invitations to grab a meal with coworkers on break or joining the conversation when we have downtime. But I have a tendency to hold back a little. As I was walking back from the gym earlier, I realized that sometimes you just have to let go. You have to stop thinking about what other people are thinking or what they could think. This is definitely easier said than done, but you can bet that I will continue to break out of my shell and that I totally danced in the rain all by myself just because I could.

5. The calendar doesn't expand just because your schedule does. I always say I wish there was more time in the day. But I know I would only fill it with more activities. Be careful not to overload your schedule, you will soon regret it if you do.

6. Eat the ice cream. I love ice cream, and I am not ashamed of that. Sometimes I think society makes us feel like we need to be embarrassed about eating things that are bad for us or that we need to have excuses about why we didn't get to the gym that day. I work hard to be healthy--both mentally and physically. And I won't let one get in the way of the other.

7. Coffee habits are really easy to form. At the end of the school year I felt like I wouldn't survive if I didn't get my daily dose of caffeine. Good sleep is so important! I know it isn't always possible to get that ideal 8 hours, but beware that you can quickly become dependent on that cup of Joe.

8. FOMO* is so real. The first thing that comes to mind is the title of Mindy Kaling's book, Why is Everyone Hanging Out Without Me? Maybe that has to do with the fact that I am obsessed with The Mindy Project right now, but is also super relatable. Sometimes your friends are going to be doing something fun, and you won't be able to join them--but you will be tempted to.

9. If a guy/girl is not putting in any effort, he/she is not worth it. Your time is valuable. And if someone likes you, they should respect that. If they want to see you, they will make the time and they will put in effort to make real plans with you. I've liked plenty of guys. In fact, sometimes I think I fall in love every other day.** But that doesn't mean that I am going to settle for uncertain plans or hoping that a guy will want to "hang out" because going on a date is too much of a "commitment".

10. Your parents did a lot more than you ever noticed. After living in my own place for almost a year now, I have become so much more appreciative of everything that my parents did. They always made sure I was fed, and that I had clean clothes. But they also washed the kitchen floors and cleaned the showers. When someone isn't around to do these things for you, you quickly notice.

11. Acting your age is overrated. So you are legally an adult now, that doesn't mean you always have to act like it. There is a time and place to act grown up. But sometimes it's okay to act silly and have a little fun.

12. Forget about the little things. Don't get bogged down in the details. Being annoyed and bitter is really easy, but being happy is way more satisfying.

13. People will come and go. It has always been hard for me to grasp that some people are only meant to be in your life for a certain amount of time. There have been people that I considered really close friends that I don't even talk to anymore. It's a shame, and sometimes I miss having those friends. I think of those people as long-term guest appearances. And the people that stick around are the regular cast members. Watch out for those people: chances are they are pretty special.

What have you learned so far outside of the classroom?

Stay tuned, I'm sure I'll do another version of this post when I graduate.

*Fear of Missing Out
**This isn't real love. The only guy I have ever really loved is Joseph Gordon-Levitt. But since he's off the market now, I am trying to keep an open mind--or rather, an open heart.

SUNNY WITH A HIGH OF 75

Originally the idea for this post was part of a list of things that I have learned from college so far. And I will post about that eventually, but I realized that I had a lot more to say about this one topic than I thought. With the weather that we have had in the last few days, it has had me thinking a lot.

A couple days ago it was almost 80 degrees and sunny. And now we are back in the 40s with rain and the kind of wind that keeps turning my umbrella inside out. It's driving me crazy.

Recently, I was introduced to the song "High of 75" by Relient K. I can't tell you how many times I have listened to this song in the last few weeks. One of the main lines is

"Lately, the weather has been so bi-polar, 
and consequently so have I." 

People always make fun of the weather as a topic of conversation, but when you live in the upper-midwest it is such a relevant topic. It can easily go from sunny and 75 to 25 and snowing in a matter of a couple days. I interpret "High of 75" in a couple of different ways. When he says,

"Don't know whether or not
 How sad I just got 
Was of my own volition,
Or if I'm just missing the sun"

I think of how much happier I am when the weather is nicer. Everyone gets so excited about the warm weather, and it feels so nice to be outside. But since they are associated with Christian rock music when he says,

"And now I'm sunny
With a High of 75
Since you took my heavy heart 
And made it light. 
And it's funny how you find
You enjoy your life
When you're happy to be alive."

it makes me think of God taking away a burden, and finding peace with your life. And I love that. I think there is something so wonderful about discovering what makes you truly at peace and happy. That last part keeps ringing through my head, "And it's funny how you find you enjoy your life when you're happy to be alive." Sometimes I think I lose sight of how many things there are to be grateful when I am stressed out and overwhelmed. It's easy to get caught up in everything that is going on. I think part of the reason I am so much calmer during the nicer weather is because I am more likely to take the time to stop and ground myself. Saturday I went on a run by the lake, and I stopped and sat on a picnic table for a while, admiring everything around me and just being. Sometimes you just need to be.

It might sound silly, but I try not to subscribe to the belief that we need to constantly be on the go. Who's keeping track anyway? Productivity is relative. So, take some time to check in with yourself. What is it going to take to get to your "sunny with a high of 75?"

In case you are wondering: According to Wikipedia, the lead singer stated the song was influenced by Northern Ohio's "undependable weather." Go figure.

The Boy Who Forgot His Birthday

I once knew a guy who forgot his own birthday. He told me this right after we discovered that we shared the same birthday. Here I was excited for this insignificant date that marked another year of me being on this planet, and he had gone a whole day without noticing that he had been around that much longer. I don’t mean to say that birthdays aren’t important. It’s a way of being thankful for another year, and it is a time of celebration. But maybe it’s not all about me. I didn’t trump God and put myself on this planet. I wasn’t involved in my conception—thank God. And I had nothing to do with the day that I showed up on this planet.

So if for one day a year, I get to celebrate the day I was born, I realized now that it shouldn’t be all “me, me, me.” Me, myself, and I can only do so much. In a whirlwind of events I found myself displaced and emotionally bankrupt. My mess multiplied and grew so out of control that I had mistaken it for a mental tumor—not a brain tumor, but a mental one. It wasn’t a physical mass in brain that was causing me physical harm; I thought my conglomeration of problems had amounted into something causing me to not function properly. Instead, I diagnosed myself with a bad case of self-pity. My dad said something that really stuck with me tonight: there are other people that have it worse than you.

I know. I dedicate my time to helping people in need and seeing what I can do to truly make a difference. Yet I had lost sight of that. I had been lazy and forgotten about my faith and, most importantly, I had forgotten about what was important to me. It’s easy to be upset, and it’s easy to wallow in all of the things that are wrong with your life and the world. The guy who’s going 25 in a 45 seems like an idiot. The woman who rams into our cart in an impatient temper-tantrum seems like an evil witch. Or what about the guy who makes it his personal mission to be a jerk to everyone he comes into contact with all day. There will always be those people. Your car will break down. Your bill will be overdue. And you will be ok.

Simply put, there are problems in the world and there are mean people. Said like a second grader, but it is the clearest way to put it. Sometimes it’s ok to forget about all of that. In life, there are times when we have to suck it up and realize that life isn’t always about us—there are bigger plans in store. The battles we face don’t seem small until we have overcome them. Just like our birthdays don’t seem that insignificant until we have forgotten them.

You have to decide what’s important in your life. Is this really the “worst possible case scenario?” Were you the only person born on that day of the year? The boy who forgot his birthday reminded me that I’m not, and that there are more important things in life. He may have just forgotten his birthday because he’s a boy and maybe he just has a really bad memory. But maybe, just maybe, he finds value in other days, and not just the ones revolved around him. I can admire that.

As for my dad goes, well let’s just say I don’t always give him the credit he deserves. So here’s to hoping to that he knows just how much I appreciate him and everything he does, even if I have trouble showing it sometimes.

Just another day from Life in the Lost and Found Bin.